042723

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nnn  nnCarol Burnett and Tim Conway were two of the most beloved comedians of their time, known for their hilarious skits and impeccable comedic timing. They made numerous appearances on “The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson,” a late-night talk show that aired on NBC from 1962 to 1992.n

One of their most memorable appearances on the show was in 1978. In the skit, Carol Burnett plays a secretary who is trying to get some work done while her bumbling colleague, played by Tim Conway, is distracting her with his antics.n

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25 Famous Celebrities Over 90 That Are Still Alive in 2023n
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Stray Dog Had A Jar Stuck On Her Head For Weeks

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SJPD Shuts Down Multiple Underground CasinosnnDetectives from the Burglary Prevention Unit (BPU) spearheaded an investigation into a criminal organization that owned and operated numerous illegal underground casinos after receiving several complaints from community members and residents.

nThe underground casinos served as a conduit for illegal activities, which included gambling, sale and use of narcotics, in addition to the purchase and sale of stolen property. BPU Detectives identified Chuong Ho as the primary suspect and criminal mastermind responsible for operating these underground casinos.nnOn Thursday, April 20, 2023, Detectives coordinated a large-scale operation serving search warrants at seven different locations.nnLocations in San José included:n• 2000 block of Whittington Driven• 1000 block of Commercial Courtn• 400 block of East Williams Streetn• 200 block of Prairiewood Courtn• 3000 block of Capewood Lanen• 1800 block of Harbor View AvenuennThe seventh location was at 21000 block of Ingomar Grade in the city of Los Baños.nnWith the assistance of the San José Police Department’s MERGE Unit, Covert Response Unit, Special Operations, Bureau of Investigations, and Patrol Officers, these underground casinos were secured and shut down. Additional Officers from the Santa Clara County Specialized Enforcement Team, Santa Clara Police Department, the DMV, and US Postal Inspectors also assisted with the investigation. Story HEREnn

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nnAlbericci, Jerry (Deceased)nnAyoob, PaulnnBalelsano, BobnnBattaglia, NicknnBattaglia, WillnnBeatie, GeorgennBell, BobnnBlackmore, Chuck (Deceased)nnCaro, LynnennComeli, IvannnCouser, RichnnDavis, BudnnDeGeorge, BobnnDini, Paulnn nn  n

nApril Birthdays

nEfegenio, MarknnFrazier, RichnnGisburne, BobnnGonzalez, RobertonnHale, DonnnHarris, DalennKosovilka, BobnnKregel, JohnnnMattocks, MichaelnnMcGuire, PatnnMeade, DonnnMontano, WilnnOuimet, JeffnnPinck, Greg

 Porter, JohnnnQuinn, JohnnnRamon, Cha ChannRealyvasquez, ArmandonnRobinson, WaltnnRoss, JoennSalerno, Paul (Deceased)nnSantos, BillnnSavala, JohnnnSchenini, JoannennSilvers, JimnnUtz, Ron (Deceased)nnWedlow, DeannnWilliams, JodinnWilliams, Rick

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‘Top shot’ LAPD officer sues chief, department over social media demandn
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Officer Toni McBride, who’s seeking more than $5 million in damages, alleges Chief Michel Moore blocked promotions because she refused to remove videos of her at shooting competitions and firing rangesnRead Full Story HERE

nnnJust wanted to let you know….I received my 2023 Social Security Stimulus Package.nnIt contained two tomato seeds, pancake mix, two discount coupons to KFC, a “Biden Build Back Better” bumper sticker, a prayer rug, a Biden Speech Decoder Ring, and a “Blame it on Trump” poster for the front yard.nnThe directions were in Spanish.nnYours should arrive soon.n

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I miss Bill

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It doesn’t matter what party you belong to, this is good natured political humor from a Canadian TV show, where a black comedian said he misses Bill Clinton… “Yep, that’s right – I miss Bill Clinton!” He was the closest thing we ever got to having a real black man as President.nHe plays the saxophone. He smoked weed. He had his way with ugly white women.nEven now? Look at him… his wife works, and he doesn’t! And, he gets a check from the government every month.nManufacturers announced today that they will be stocking America’s shelves this week with “Clinton Soup,” in honor of one of the nations’ distinguished men. It consists primarily of a weenie in hot water.nChrysler Corporation is adding a new car to its line to honor Bill Clinton. The Dodge Drafter will be built in Canada.nWhen asked what he thought about foreign affairs, Clinton replied, “I don’t know, I never had one.”nThe Clinton revised judicial oath:n“I solemnly swear to tell the truth as I know it, the whole truth as I believe it to be, and nothing but what I think you need to know.”nClinton will be recorded in history as the only President to have sex in the Oval Office between the Bushes.nIt’s just been announced by Dell that a new computer will be introduced to the market in the near future. It’s the Bill Clinton model featuring a 6 inch hard-drive and no memory.

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Senior Wisdom

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The ability to speak several languages is an asset, but keeping your mouth shut in any language is priceless.nBe decisive. Right or wrong, make a decision. The road is paved with flat squirrels who couldn’t make a decision.nHappiness is not having to set the alarm clock.nWhen I get a headache, I take two aspirin and keep away from children, just like the bottle says.nJust once, I want the prompt for username and password to say, “Close enough.”nBecoming an adult is the dumbest thing I’ve ever done.nIf you see me talking to myself, just move along. I’m self-employed. We’re having a meeting.n“Your call is critical to us. Please enjoy this 40-minute flute solo”.nDoes anyone else have a plastic bag full of plastic bags or is it just me?nI hate it when I can’t figure out how to operate the iPad, and my tech support guy is asleep. He’s five, and it’s past his bedtime.nToday’s 3-year-olds can switch on laptops and open their favorite apps. When I was 3, I ate mud.nTip for a successful marriage: Don’t ask your wife when dinner will be ready while she’s mowing the lawn.nSo, you drive across town to a gym to walk on a treadmill?nI didn’t make it to the gym today. That makes five years in a row.nI decided to stop calling the bathroom “John” and renamed it “Jim.” I feel so much better saying I went to the Jim this morning.nOld age is coming at a really bad time.nIf God wanted me to touch my toes, He would’ve put them on my knees.nLast year, I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven’t met yet.nWhy do I have to press one for English when you’re just transferring me to someone I can’t understand anyway?nNow, I’m wondering . . . did I send this to you, did you send it to me, or have I only sent one copy?nYou don’t need anger management. You need people to stop pissing you off.nYour people skills are just fine. It’s your tolerance for idiots that needs work.n”On time” is usually when you get there.nEven duct tape can’t fix stupid, but it sure does muffle the sound.nIt would be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free…and three sizes smaller.nLately, you’ve noticed people your age are much older than you.n”One for the road” means peeing before you leave the house.n

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WALMART COWBOY……

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Triple Entry, hey guys if you are gonna pass these around let others know you sent it in, OK?

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Justice! Don’t Steal Bikes!n

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nTrusting dogn

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Sweden halts export to russia ..Now things are getting seriousnn

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C’YA

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THE BEST ANTHEM EVER PERFORMED!nn

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Lpyle#1621

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