AND YOU THINK YOUR WEATHER IS BAD!!!

Sensible Logic

  1 – Eleven teens die each day because of texting while driving. Maybe it’s time to raise the age of Smart Phone ownership to 21. (FACT) 
  
2 – If gun control laws actually worked, Chicago would be Mayberry, USA 
  
3 – The Second Amendment makes more women equal than the entire feminist movement. 
  
4 – Legal gun owners have 300 million guns and probably a trillion rounds of ammo. Seriously, folks, if we were the problem, you’d know it. 
  
5 – When JFK was killed, nobody blamed the rifle. 

6 – The NRA (National Rifle Association) murders 0 people and receives ($$$$ 0) nothing in government funds. Planned Parenthood kills 350,000 babies every year and receives $500,000,000 in tax dollars annually. 
  
7 – I have no problem with vigorous background checks when it comes to firearms. While we’re at it, let’s do the same when it comes to immigration, Voter I.D., and candidates running for office. 

8 – Folks keep talking about another Civil War. One side knows how to shoot and probably has a trillion rounds. The other side has crying closets and is confused about which bathroom to use. How do you think that would work out? 

9   A man who left 300,000 guns for the Taliban is lecturing folks on gun control. 
  
Don’t be afraid to share this. There’s more logic and common sense expressed here than probably anything you have seen on the news today.

For my friends of a certain age

1. The biggest joke on mankind is that computers have begun asking humans to prove they aren’t a robot.
2. When a kid says “Daddy, I want mommy”that’s the kid version of “I’d like to speak to your supervisor”.
3. It’s weird being the same age as old people.
4. Just once, I want a username and password prompt to say CLOSE ENOUGH.
5. If I am ever on life support, unplug me and plug me back in and see if that works.
6. Do you ever wake up in the morning and look in the mirror and think… “That can’t be accurate?”
7. Last night the internet stopped working so I spent a few hours with my family. They seem like nice people.
8. If Adam and Eve were Cajuns, they would have eaten the snake instead of the Apple and saved us all a lot of trouble.
9. We celebrated last night with a couple of adult beverages …… Metamucil and Ensure.
10. You know you are getting old when friends with benefits means having someone who can drive at night.
11. Weight loss goal: To be able to clip my toenails and breathe at the same time.
12. After watching how some people wear their masks, I understand why contraception fails.
13. Some of my friends exercise every day. Meanwhile I am watching a show I don’t like because the remote fell on the floor.
14. For those of you who don’t want Alexa or Siri listening in on your conversation, they are making a male version. It doesn’t listen to anything.
15. I just got a present labeled, ‘From Mom and Dad’, and I know damn well Dad has no idea what’s inside.
16. Now that I have lived through a plague, I totally understand why Italian renaissance paintings are full of fat people lying on couches.

And as my addition to this obviously copy-and-pasted list,

When young people mock you for their having to teach you how to use new programs and devices, just remind them that you had to teach THEM how to use a SPOON.

 I Nearly Became A Doctor

When I was young I decided I wanted to be a doctor.

So, I took the entrance exam to go to Medical School.

One of the questions asked was to rearrange the letters

PNEIS into the name of an important human body part

which is most useful when erect.

Those who answered spine are doctors today.

The rest of us are sending jokes via e-mail.

Another trip down memory lane – Some really good ones!

When you get to the pictures, it’s fun to try and guess who they are before reading the captions. I bet you’ll get most of them!

Feeling Old(er) In 2023? This might be the reason why… 

– The Beatles split 49years ago.
– The movie, ‘Wizard of Oz’ is 84 years old.
– Elvis died 46 years ago. He’d be 88 today.
– Michael Jackson’s ‘Thriller’ video is 41 years old.
– Mickey Mantle retired 54 years ago.
– The movie, ‘Saturday Night Fever’ is 48 years old.
– The Ed Sullivan show ended 52 years ago.
– The Corvette turned 70 years old this year.
– The Mustang is 59.

And now for some great old photos!

Buddy Ebsen Dolly Parton Johnny CashLee MarvinGene HackmanEdward G. Robinson, WW I Ed McMahon Leonard Nimoy Edward G. Robinson, WW I Clint Eastwood

Don Rickles with ?Tom Hanks Jack NicholsonDwight D. Eisenhower Lucy and Desi, WWII Paul Newman Dan BlockerJack Benny Clint Eastwood Frank Sinatra

Lucille Ball Yul Brynner Sean Connery Marlon Brando Glenn Ford & Bride Farrah Fawcett Mae West Clark Gable Steve McQueen Jack Benny

Subject: This is Priceless! (Never truer than today.)

One of the last great Democrat POTUS!
President Harry Truman – Truth News Network

…What is meant by the modern term referred to as “POLITICAL CORRECTNESS”…The definition is found in 4 telegrams at the Truman Library and Museum in Independence, Missouri.

The following are copies of four telegrams between President Harry Truman and General Douglas MacArthur on the day before the actual signing of the WWII Surrender Agreement in September 1945.

The contents of those four telegrams below are exactly as received at the end of the war – not a word has been added or deleted!

(1) Tokyo, Japan 0800-September 1,1945

To: President Harry S Truman

From: General D A MacArthur

Tomorrow, we meet with those yellow-bellied bastards and sign the Surrender Documents, any last-minute instructions?

(2) Washington, D C 1300-September 1, 1945

To: D A MacArthur

From: H S Truman Congratulations, job well done, but you must tone down your obvious dislike of the Japanese when discussing the terms of the surrender with the press, because some of your remarks are fundamentally not politically correct!

(3) Tokyo, Japan 1630-September 1, 1945

To: H S Truman

From: D A MacArthur and C H Nimitz
Wilco Sir, but both Chester and I are somewhat confused, exactly what does the term politically correct mean?

(4) Washington, D C 2120-September 1, 1945

To: D A MacArthur/C H Nimitz
From: H S Truman
Political Correctness is a doctrine, recently fostered by a delusional, illogical minority and promoted by a sick mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a piece of shit by the clean end!

Now, with special thanks to the Truman Museum and Harry himself, you and I finally have a full understanding of what ‘POLITICAL CORRECTNESS’ really means….

L.Pyle#1621